Ten Days: Day Ten

One Confession!

Part of me wants to leave and just never look back. I am tired of trying to get people to care about me. I care so much for them, and yet I am only around when they NEED me. I am emotionally exhausted, tired of heartache, lies, and just completely selfish people.

Maybe then I would be happier? No one would know me, I could reinvent myself, and just…exist in a world where no one would just NEED me, they would want me in their lives. A nice fantasy it is though, right?

Ten Days: Day Nine!

Two Pictures That Explain Your Life, Right Now. Why?

I am just really going through alot! I have no where to turn to talk to anyone. No one would understand so I just…keep it to myself.

Ten Days: Day Eight!

Three Turn Ons!!!

Intelligence is very sexy to me.

Confidence is so so sexy to me as well.

Respect also is sexy and turns me on.

Of course the list goes on and on but I am limited to three, so these are the best three that are not even fetish or kink related. 

Ten Days: Day Six!!!

Five People I Care About The Most!

My Daughter – I would walk through hell for her.

My Mema – RIP

My Spouse – I love him with all of my soul

My Mother – Even if we dont always see eye to eye.

My Beeb – Who has become my best friend and
knows the dark corners of my soul.

Ten Days: Day Five!!!

Six Things You Wish You Have Never Done!

Accepted a drink from my ex at a party.

Thrown a knife at the wall during an
argument with my partner.

Moving out when I was 20 and not protecting my brother from my stepmom

Not picking up my adopted brother, only to later find out he was murdered three hours later.

Not keeping in touch with friends from my youth.

Not being there for my mother when she was ready to divorce my father and end her cycle of being abused.

Ten Days: Day Four!

Seven Things That Cross Your Mind, All The Time.

How to stop being in so much pain all the time.

Ways to be a better submissive!

Always looking for better ways to improve myself as a person in general.

If my animals are truly happy.

Why the people in the world just cant live peacefully?

Stupid songs that keep repeating in my head! I.E. Chicken Wing, Chicken Wing, Hot Dogs and Bologne, Chicken and Macaroni, CHILLING with my Homies!!!

All the million tasks and things I still need to do, and get done, but lack motivation for it!!! HELP!!!

Ten Days: Day Three

Eight Ways to Get To My Heart!

Honesty – No matter how it might hurt.

Humor – If you make me laugh, you get in fast.

Food – Great Food – Tacos!!!

Chivalry – Male or Female – Chivalry is beautiful.

Be silly and adventurous with me.

Be Spontaneous and take me on an adventure!

Be willing to learn new things with me.

Make me feel important to you!

Ten Days: Day Two

 What “Old Person” Things Do You Do?

I complain about things a lot more.

I eat a lot more soup and vegetables.

I squint to read things on the screen

I seriously cannot hear anymore it seems and have to have people repeat things to me.

If You Could Know The Absolute And Total Truth To One Question, What Question Would You Ask?

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

You Are About To Get Into A Fight, What Song Comes On As Your Soundtrack?

Hit me with your best shot! Though it would be this version: 

What Do You Miss Most About Being A Kid?

Actually getting to be a kid and not being a parent to two little brothers and a little sister. It is no secret that I grew up in an abusive household but no one knew I had custody of my siblings at 18.

What, If Anything, Have You Ever Re-Gifted?

I am guilty of this. My brother got me this gift of wine bottles. An entire dozen of them, but…I had to pay an etra 75 dollars to get them delivered, and then came to learn that it was also a membership fee that I learned the next month of 150 dollars. The wine came and only 2 bottles were kinds I liked, so now I give out wine to people if they enjoy wines! I still have 9 left…HELP!

If You Could Hack Into Any One Computer, Whose Computer Would You Choose?

The federal reserve. I would hack them, take back OUR money and give it to those in need! Great thing I know NOTHING about hacking.

If You Could Change 3 Things About Your Country, What Would You Change?

A. That we are Americans – Not anything else. Not white american, not asian american, not african american, mexican american, nothing of the sort. If you were BORN in America, YOU ARE American!

B. All of hollywood, sports, politicians, etc would be paid minimum wage, and our military would make the big bucks!

C. Our Healthcare would teach you how to protect against getting ill, with natural things, instead of giving you chemicals to fix an ailment that will return.

These are just off the top of my head, but I have a huge list.

What Gets Too Much Attention In The News?

Stupid ass celebrities! Whether it be sports, actors, singers, etc. You arent special just because you can catch a football, or breathe on a camera scene.

What Personality Trait Do You Wish You Had?

Patience. I seriously do not have any. So much so that it irritates me greatly!

Ten Days: Day One

Ten things you want to say to people right now!

This is my list of things I would say to so many people in my life. I did not include their names because that is not important. What is important is being able to list these things, and for me to understand what I do want to say to people.

  1. I do not want to do this anymore!
  2. Why was I never good enough?
  3. I am sorry I couldn’t save you!
  4. I wish we could go back in time!
  5. You make me want to be a better person!
  6. I would always choose you, over and over again.
  7. It is okay to not be okay!
  8. I forgive you!
  9. Why couldn’t we have met at a better time?
  10. Just hunt me, and lock me in your basement!